More antics of mini me 25, September 2010
Posted by babychaos in General Wittering, Life and living, Mini Me, Mum.Tags: children, General Wittering, motherhood
add a comment
Grand Prix qualifying today, wee man was having his ‘rest’ he doesn’t sleep but he does need some time on his own so I put him upstairs with books and he burbles away. Mr BC and I sat happily in front of the telly listening to the baby monitor.
God knows how but he’d managed to get a pot of sudocreme – that’s nappy cream to the non breeders – it was a huge catering sized vat.
Downstairs, Mr BC and I are listening as we watch, it’s about time to collect Mini Me but he’s very quiet, is he asleep? We listen? No… there is some noise but it’s furtive – none of the usual cheery singing. After 20 minutes or so we decide he is awake and, knowing how much he will love the qualifying he likes ‘fast cars’ I go up and get him.
The site that greets me is… interesting. Imagine a mechanic. The messiest mechanic you have ever seen, with oil on their forehead, arms, clothes and everything else around them. Got that? Right, now turn the black white. I know he’s been up to something the minute I walk in because an aura of glee almost knocks me over when I go into the room.
I open the curtains and he looks up at me smiling. There is sudocreme on his forehead, his dummy and he clutches a sock in one hand which is also white with sudocreme. His trousers are white, his shirt is white and he has removed an arm and one shoulder to wear it toga style.
“Ah,” I say, “I see you have some sudocreme.”
“I have put it on this tractor,” he holds the white greasy tractor up proudly, “and this tractor,” he holds up another one, “and my feet.”
“Mmm…” I say, “Why?” That’s thrown him. He looks nonplussed but continues to smile proudly and sweetly. “Is there any left?” I ask. He hands me the container and I peer in. “No.”
It is also all over his books, and Mr Tiger, his favourite cuddly, has a slightly greasy sheen.
“Did you…?” I point.
“He had a sore bottom.” He says. The laughter bubbles up, like John McEnroe, I canNOT be serious.
More antics of Mini-Me 12, September 2010
Posted by babychaos in baby stuff, General Wittering, Life and living, Mini Me, Mom, Mum, toddlers.Tags: children, General Wittering
1 comment so far
Wee man has taking to running round the house unaccompanied. This is OK if I listen out but when things go very quiet it’s time to go and investigate.
Today things went quiet but I was on the loo and well you know how it is I was trapped until I had finished. The unusually peaceful atmosphere was occasionally broken by the sound of footsteps overhead. Oh dear. Then silence, except for a gentle thump every now and again, a door banging quietly? Yes, sounded like it.
As soon as I was able I headed hot foot upstairs. Nothing, not a peep.
There had been an incursion into Mr BC’s office which needed to be put right and then, as I finished tidying up, I heard it again, a gentle thud. Hmm… had he got trapped in the spare room again? He can get in there but not always out.
I went into the hall.There was the bang again. I recognised it now, it was the spare bathroom or one of the cuboards – but I couldn’t remember which one.
“Where is he…?” I said to myself as I walked. As I reached the airing cupboard the door opened slowly and a small blonde boy with the biggest most seraphic smile I have ever seen peeped out.
“I have been hiding., he said proudly and pointed, “in there…”
“Mmm… you have, haven’t you?” Was all I could say.
He’d done all sorts of bad things, like going upstairs unattended, going into his father’s office and mussing up my neatly stacked towels but there was no mischief in it and anyway I was laughing too much to be able to tell him off.
Back downstairs he spent the morning running around with an orange balloon he’d been given to take home from a party. He is very keen on the balloon and keeps saying,
“Thank you Eleanor. Thank you for my balloon.” (It was Eleanor’s party) Then he hands it to me and says. “Muggie’s balloon.” That’s my cue to chase him round the house bashing him over the head with it while he guffaws with laughter. The game usually ends when he’s laughing too much to be able to run any more and trips over and hurts himself.
“I bang my knee.” He will say, standing on one leg and proffering the banged knee upwards. “Muggy kiss it better.”
I do as I am told.
And now I must sleep, Mini BC is getting up very early at the moment.
I’m talking ’bout things… 15, May 2010
Posted by babychaos in baby stuff, General Wittering, Mini Me, Mom, Mum, not while you're eating, toddlers.Tags: children, General Wittering, motherhood, toddler, writing
1 comment so far
I went car booting today, arrived home and mini-me runs into the garage with his daddy.
“Hello gorgeous!” I say.
“Hello Muggie!” He replies. Two words together. Yes, as of this morning we are doing phrases, with consistency I mean because phrases are what he did first (a two off “I dat” and “I go la” at 9 months then a one off “no mummy, I get this today” at 13 months or so which was the time he started saying the odd word).
His cognative skills are better too.
He also has a hissy fit if I…
- Shut a door without letting him do it for
- Flush the loo myself.
- Help myself to loo paper – I MUST allow him to remove it from the roll and hand it to me in tiny pieces or, if I’m lucky, sheet by sheet.
I’ve probably psychologically scarred him for life using a menstrual cup in his presence but very possibly slightly less than if I’d shut him out in the hall while I did it, judging by the yelling that goes on if I do.
Finally, I’ve published ANOTHER e-short which you can find here it’s also on Feedbooks if you prefer. Blurb below, enjoy.
They Came, They Saw, They Took the Tinfoil.
Gerry wakes up in in a bath full of cold water in her interview suit and best shoes. How did she get there? How did she sleep and why is there nothing aluminium left in the flat? Her flatmate Jane wants a shower, her other flatmate, Nina, is looking for her saucepans but Gerry… she just wants answers. British English, a bit of light swearing U/PG
Life after birth.. 16, December 2008
Posted by babychaos in baby stuff, General Wittering.Tags: general stuff, General Wittering, household, Life and living, life with a baby
4 comments
I can’t help chuckling. I started this blog the first time I got pregnant. I thought I’d write a kind of pregnancy/new baby diary in the style of Maureen Lipman. If you haven’t read any of her articles/books I urge you to do so. They’re a witty, intelligent take on every day life and great fun.
So no I do have the baby but of course no time to write a blog! Stop press, this week I’ve had flu – yes no flu for 8 years and then with a baby, why at once! It’s gone now though, hoorah! We have carpeted the playroom, got a play pen and set up sofa and telly in there so we now have one room which is our decor, not formal and most importantly, warm. Junior fell off the bed onto his head but is fine.
We were going to have Christmas here but Mr BC’s parents are both ill so we’ll be taking it to them in Wales, manic ringing round and begging to kennels for the cat has ensued!
Yes… as you can see. Life is all go!
Oops that’s my 10 minutes! Boy is awake and will soon be ganting for another enormous meal!
