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More Search Strings.. 10, January 2007

Posted by babychaos in General Wittering, Humour, Light Fluff, Play.

After my intriguing findings last time I reviewed my stats I decided to do it again. Tip top requests include information about miscarriage which is great if my posts are helping any fellow sufferers to feel any more human about it or any less afraid.

Other recurring themes are the search for Christmas Jokes and especially crap ones, Steve Irwin jokes, desparate attempts to find the Comic Relief Show Me the Way to Amarillo video (sorry I can’t help you with that one) pictures of Britney with no nickers and famous people talking about fame – actually it was only one famous person but when the first one you pick turns out to be that down to earth and sorted you don’t need two – we salute you, Mr Spangly, wise god of rock.

There are some crackers though which I thought I would share. Where I can I have also offered some advice should the poor unfortunates concerned return… so here we go…

how do i euthenase my dog – my biggest question about this one is how did they end up here?
embarassing stories + wee – oooookaaay. Moving swiftly on.
carrots with an erection – say again? One of the best of all time, surely! A score of at least 9 out of 10 on the odd-o-meter
Chaos Fairies – either I’ve inadvertantly used a real phrase or this one was actually looking for me.
careering out of control – where? Who with? How? What on?
i love carrots – Good for you! So do I.
random thoughts – oooh this one could have been looking for me, too.
once, twice, three times a woman – this is what happens when you bastardise song titles. Apologies to all Commadores fans for disappointing you.
heap pain when sitting down – celebrity visit from Little Plum
consigned – Eh?
get me in the mood for christmas – oops they came to the wrong place.
Yesterday – one of the most covered songs of all time over 1700 I believe. Unfortunately the Beatles don’t get any royalties for this or any other Northern Songs. A few years ago EMI put Northern Songs up for sale. Paul McCartney wanted to buy them but he was worried Yoko Ono would freak so while he was trying to get in touch with her and work something out Michael Jackson nipped in and bought them all. I love the Beatles, I had to jemmy in a mention.
funny carrots and vegetables – yes! Result, somebody else wants to talk about love carrots.
luscious lotus – yes it is and it’s all mine!
radiation sickness miserable child – this sounds seriously grim.
scraps flooding machine – So this is what Scooby’s annoying little nephew is doing now? What machine though, where.
cant taste menthol – Lucky you!
my husband farts smell – ALL farts smell lady! Buy him a cork and light a match
number 53 – and wibble to you too
signs that you have BO smell – people won’t come too close?
can\’t smell own bo – other people can, ask.

I thought you’d enjoy these, half the time it’s not so much what they’re asking so much as how they have ended up here that amazes me.


1. Geldoff - 11, January 2007

Priceless 🙂 The other thing that leaves me wondering is WHY some people enter what they do into a search engine, eg: “my husband farts smell”. Is she looking for a remedy or is it new form of primal scream where you feel you can reach innumerable, empathetic people?

On a more serious note though, some of these could be random hits generated by sites like http://www.stumbleupon.com, which is a great site for when you’re sat in front of PeeCee with a moment to spare (or you haven’t but you just dang don’t wanna do what you’re sat there for = distraction strategy). You download a benign toolbar, select some fields of interest, press the Stumble button and are treated to a weird and wonderful, but mostly very interesting, selection of websites that you would never otherwise have found.

Go on! Have a stumble – it costs nothing and you know you wanna! (At this point I’m picturing myself with little horns and a tail with an arrow head and holding a red trident.)

2. mrsmetaphor - 11, January 2007

Can you imagine actually typing “carrots with an erection” into the search engine? ach du lieber.

3. babychaos - 11, January 2007

Absolutely, how would you get the word “carrots” and “erection” together… EVER? Geldoff I have already made a primary reconissance visit to stumbleupon… I can see the slippery slide beginning oh horned trident gripping one.



4. Geldoff - 12, January 2007

YOU … CAN … NOT … RE … SIST ….

5. iheartblackeyes - 12, January 2007

Hey! How are you? Dang, your blog makes me laugh so hard. I’m just shitty at leaving comments.

6. babychaos - 12, January 2007

Aw you say the sweetest things! Thank you!



7. Mrs. Nicklebee - 12, January 2007


The “euthanase” string was from comment 54 of the Steve Irwin thread. I, too, was curious so pasted that search string into Google (so it’s going to show up in your search string list at least one more time) and came up with this:

The Obligatory Steve Irwin Joke « Random thoughts consigned to the …
My two cents. 52. collie dog – September 23, 2006 … but want to euthenase something because it has a minor fracture of a toe, or is an awkward age (a …
babychaos.wordpress.com/2006/09/06/the-obligatory-steve-irwin-joke/ – 51k –

It took a little bit of scrolling and an eventual “Find in this page”, but it’s in there.

The carrots and *ahem* other thing I suspect came from your mention of carrots and the link in your blogroll which makes me think someone was searching specifically for your blog.

Fun thread!

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