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One Drink + One BC = Painful Accident… Always 14, January 2007

Posted by babychaos in General Wittering, Light Fluff, Play.
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I went away for the weekend. I spent two nights in bed with somebody called Billy… well, I think it’s Billie actually. Not as exciting as it sounds. Billie is a cat and she sleeps on the spare bed at my friend’s house. She sleeps there when there’s a guest in it, too. I rather liked it as I missed my husband-shaped hot waterbottle keenly.

Mr BC, meanwhile, was at his work “Christmas” party on the Friday night – they did better than some years, they often have it in about March. It was an R&B party which got everyone all excited about dressing up, the girls as Bra and Pants artistes, the boys as whatever it is male R&B artists wear and Mr BC as one of the Blues Brothers. The head of the company and his second in command got wind of what was happening and had to send a corrective e-mail round, R&B wasn’t a theme. It stood for Robert and Brian – their names. Something about that absolutely shouts “SPUD” to me. According to Mr BC they are, indeed, ultra-spudly. The kind of people who hit 80 at about 24 years old and remain that age for the rest of their days. Smirk. Guffaw!

So while Mr BC was living it up with work I went to see my mate. She loves climing and so on the Friday I went out with her and some mates and acted as score keeper/secretary/mother /jumper and water holder while they did a bouldering competition.

Boldering entails going into a huge hanger like place and doing a series of climbs up a low climing wall, in this case about 15 or 20 foot high, with a crash mat. They give you a list of climbs, classed from easy through to very hard. Most of them looked very hard to me as they appeared to involve a lot of hanging up side down without falling off. All the same, it looked great fun. I was rather jealous as I am not permitted to jump off anything, what with all the knee surgery I’ve been having. I did have to watch out for people landing on my head though, there was a different competition going on on a much higher climbing wall behind me and once they’d finished the people in this one had to absale down. They did it very carefully but it still caused the odd gentle bump.

There’s something amusingly surreal about hearing somebody say.

“Excuse me.”

Looking round and finding they are not in front, beside or behind you but hovvering uncertainly just above your head.

Anyway, once my mate plus friends had finished – they climbed as many as they could – we went off for a ruby murry. They were all very pleased because they’d blown their previous high scores out of the water so we um… well, we drank quite a bit and then repaired to her house for a whisky… or two. They started talking about upper body strength – very important for climbing – and also something you tend to enjoy quite a bit of if you have to spend any time on crutches. She has a bar across her bathroom door so she can do pull ups. Everyone had a go so I decided I would. Unfortunately they are all honed atheletes and I am 13 stones. So I duly pulled up, my body swung out from under me, as it does, and then the bar fell off the door and I landed on the ground on my back. There was a loud ker-dunk as my head hit the floor the “ker” is the first impact, the “dunk” the second because, you see, it bounced.

On the upside, there was someone there with enough medical knowledge to confirm that I was not concussed so we didn’t end up in A&E – a very good thing because we were all pissed and it was five to three in the morning. Continuing on the upside, I don’t think I have destroyed any body parts for life – I will have to explain to you how I finally put the kybosh on my quality second knee at some point – although I am ready to believe I’ve cracked a rib at the back…

On the downside. Falling, even six feet, onto your back makes for big bruises and of course the pain increases over the next couple of days as it stiffens up. I’ve driven back from Leeds this morning and now my back fucking smarts. I have two huge bruises on my elbow, too. Although I’m delighted to report that the headache which I had all yesterday has finally gone! A partial success then.

Even so, it was a great weekend. I finally got to fly my new kites. We had a go with the delta wing in Leeds, a bit fell off it and I managed to find two pieces of other people’s kites but not the strut from my own – bloody typical. Even so it was way cool and since the woman who sold it to me at the car boot (£4.00 what a bobby bargain) was given it by the Women’s British/World/European (I forget which) delta wing kite flying champion who made it, herself, I can only assume the parts are available on the internet. So we repaired to Ilkley Moor where we decided to try out my 6ft parachute type kite, ah hang on, I’ve just discovered it’s called a “power kite” and I’m pretty sure it’s a Flexifoil Stacker 6 – £5.00 from a car boot, £74.00 new (mwa ha ha haaargh I love a bargain). This we did successfully, despite my injuries and it was brilliant.

Not so brilliant driving home in the dark with both dip bulbs blown on the Lotus. Wanted to check the fuses but couldn’t help thinking that if I did so, 200 miles from home, the fuse box was likely to melt when I looked at it or even spontaneously combust – because life’s like that – necessitating a long trip home on the back of an AA low loader.

Never mind. Followed a Range Rover home who clearly had Road Angel fitted. Either that or he knew where every speed camera on the A1 is between Leeds and London. He was doing a good old clip so I just sat behind him and by the time I hit the A14, I knew where the cameras were anyway so I was home in about two and a half hours with lots of loud music, singing and enjoying the ludicrous acceleration, blue dials with flourescent pink pointy to the numbers bits and pervy suede interior. Grrrr Easy tiger! No problem with the back I could feel it but the pain wasn’t too bad. Now, though, oh boy, I can hardly walk.

That’ll teach me to get over indulgent and over enthusiastic!

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Comments»

1. mrsmetaphor - 15, January 2007

What an interesting sight I must be to my husband who sits here next to me as I read your blog, BC…

real life audio soundtrack:

(me)
laughing
laughing
laughing
“Oh!”
“Ouch!”
laughing
laughing

2. babychaos - 15, January 2007

I’m delighted it made you laugh. I hope Mr M was not too bemused.

Pipple toot.

BC

3. susie - 15, January 2007

I was wondering what you’d done …self harm is a terrible thing hehe..poor you. Don’t suppose the Olbas will quite work this time. Get better soon ;o)

4. lea alissa - 15, January 2007

crap..ker-dunk sounds really bad…it’s finally clear to me..guess I was lucky I didn’t wreck myself too much save for patches of muscle here and there. And that I didn’t injure my mates when they pulled me up so I could get on the ladder-less boat..

I hope you feel better soon BC!

5. Geldoff - 16, January 2007

Glad to hear that you’d liberally administered lashings of liquid anaesthetic prior to embarking upon acts of bravura! How very forward thinking and backward falling. :-))
Loved the ‘spudly’ comment, chortle-chortle-snort.

Hope the pain recedes quickly, BC!

Geldoff.

6. Mrs. Nicklebee - 16, January 2007

Oh ouch!! I’m so sorry that happened!! *shudder* My sister just suffered a similar landing last week. I’ll be praying that you heal quickly. Someone half your weight wouldn’t have faired much better, in my opinion. I hope you are free to take it easy for a few days. *Mrs. N. hands BC the unopened bottle of MSM capsules she just bought Saturday.*

7. Foiled… « Random thoughts consigned to the scrap heap of cyberspace - 18, July 2007

[…] memory. I’m not sure whether it’s down to a bonk on the head I received in January (see here for details) or hormones – it’s like it was when I was pregnant only I’m not […]


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