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Rain! Rain! Go away! 22, August 2007

Posted by babychaos in Life and living, Light Fluff, Play, whinging, winging.
Tags: , , , ,

Boo! More rain but this time it comes with wind. Yep, God has definitely been at the heavenly Portuguese bean stew. I wish he’d stop. I mean, it’s August for heaven’s sake! It’s not the equinox*.

Here in East Anglia we have gales while the rest of the British Isles has bright sun… like last year then, when Britain had the hottest July and August on record except here in East Anglia where we had the hottest July on record followed by the wettest August… er… before this one that is.

Never mind, while the wind has put paid to my cycle ride today, I can always go for a longer ride next time. I did think of going out anyway and doing my normal route at just under walking pace but the embarrassment of all those little old ladies walking their dogs strolling past me, whilst – purple in the face and pedalling furiously – I creep my bicycle forwards into the wind was too much.

I also toyed with the idea of doing about 20 laps round “the Pits” our local set of gravel pits, which are surrounded by nice cinder tracks in a woodland and therefore wind-free – at ground level anyway – setting.

Trouble is, you can’t really let rip, narrow paths, too may people with dogs too and I don’t like cycling when you’re just clock watching. Even if I went to the special speed ramp at the end and spent an hour or so practising my bunny hops I don’t think I’d have much fun… I don’t think I have the stamina to do bunny hops for an hour, either. So I’ve resigned myself to do a longer ride next time.

In the meantime, although I’m not going to be exercising quite as hard, I do, at least, have a very large kite… and I’m due to meet some mates for lunch in town, so a quick trip to park first to be a loon I think! Well… it’s reasonable exercise… isn’t it?

[Brief interlude while cat appears with bird. BC persuades cat to drop bird because it’s alive but once dropped it’s not moving. BC fears cat has broken its back so looks other way and tells cat to go ahead and eat bird, then, since it’s clearly paralysed. Scuffling ensues and bird, very much alive and un-paralysed disappears behind back of sink. BC locks cat out of kitchen and retrieves bird. Awkwardly, with bird in cupped hands, BC lets cat back into kitchen where he goes straight under the sink to make an extensive search for his wandering snack. BC takes said “snack” outside and lets it go. With remarkable good sense it flies into next door’s garden.]

Hello again. Where was I? Oh yes. The rain…

What’s so interesting about all this crap weather is that in my mind I keep formulating parts a letter of complaint! I mean who to? Perhaps I should drop by the Cathedral with a stiff letter of complaint for the Bishop to pass on to the Almighty.

“Dear lord, this global warming thing is the pits! The weather’s fucking terrible and it’s so windy I am unable to go out on my bike! Can’t you do something about it?

Lots of love BC.

PS something approaching daylight – rather than the sub-acquaeous, Stygian gloom we are getting at the moment and have had for weeks and weeks and weeks and weeks, would also be handy.”

I can just imagine His reply.

“Dear BC,

I’m sorry to hear of your predicament which is so much worse than so many other people’s in the world today (not). I suggest you buy a kite and a light box.

Lots of love God.

PS You shouldn’t swear.”

Hey ho…

* Yeh, yeh… I know what it is. Polar ice caps melting push icebergs further south which push the gulf stream further over which means the pissy weather front which normally sits over the Atlantic all summer, kept there by the warm air rising from the gulf stream ends up over Britain and Western France, instead.

[Cat has gone out. BC now duty called to distract cat and check status of bird population. “The time has come to say goodbye…”]



1. mrsmetaphor - 22, August 2007

Send some of the wet over here, babe. We’re having a terrible drought.

I love your letter to the Almighty. Keep after Him, you know how He can be….

2. lauriekendrick - 23, August 2007

Hi BC,

You could be in Houston, Texas with 85 percent humidity and 93 degrees. Our hair looks like hell, but our skin is FABULOUS.

Hope all is well with you and yours in the MotherLand. We send our best in the colonies!

Laurie Kendrick

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