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Phnark! Swamp gas alert! 12, February 2008

Posted by babychaos in Adult Content, General Wittering, Light Fluff, not while you're eating, Play, Pregnancy Issues.
Tags: , , , , , ,

Please note, the “not while you’re eating” tag is switched on.

Just back from holiday, relaxed, refreshed and sorting out a couple of bits of administrivia.

I was going through my maternity notes – mainly to find out when I should be booking appointments and adding an alarm to my PDA so I book them in time to have them in the right week at the right time.

So… early on in my pregnancy, when I had bad period pains and they were worried it might be an ectopic pregnancy the Doctor sent me in for an emergency scan. Glancing at the notes I found this.

“Left ovary appears normal. Right ovary was not identified due to overlying bowel gas.”

You know what this means people?  My pending farts are opaque.

Mmm… is that gross or a major achievement?

When I was a kid I used to think it would be brilliant if farts showed.  No dropping an evil air biscuit and blaming it on other people.  A cloud of pink gas rising from a farter’s arse would make it abundantly clear who the culprit was.  Yeh, so I was weird, what of it?



1. flyingrowan - 12, February 2008

hmm indeed. i had similar ideas about poo and the shape of arseholes {sorry everyone} so that everyone’s poo would come out a slightly different shape. a bit like those playdough devices that squeezes the dough out in different patterns… Opaque farts are to be commended

2. Joe Drinker - 13, February 2008

Opaque, huh? That makes me a little uncomfortable to think about.

3. Kat - 13, February 2008

You’re brave to get an ultrasound with farts pending! LOL

4. cataclismical - 13, February 2008

Sounds nasty .. I hope the opaqueness clears up soon!

5. Geldoff - 14, February 2008

… and here we were, thinking that fog is a naturally occurring phenomenon.

Ring, ring: “Hello, could I speak to Sir David Attenborough please?”

6. magneto bold too - 14, February 2008

*snort* I wish Boo’s stench came in green. Warning sign and go with my decor.

7. Mark Kenny - 14, February 2008

I like the way you spelled it with PH and not F. I like it when people take care to spell words correctly that aren’t real words 🙂

8. babychaos - 15, February 2008

Flying r, that’s well scary, but brilliant! Joe, I’m sorry to hear that! Kat, I had no choice! Cataclismical, it was ok, Geldoff I will never view fog the same way again, Magneto, I wonder if you could engineer something to feed him which would do it, Mark, I’m glad you appreciate my pseudo-pedantry!



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