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The Chaos Fairies Are Eating My Life! 23, April 2008

Posted by babychaos in Adult Content, General Wittering, Life and living, Pregnancy Issues, whinging, winging.
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Yes they are. A brief hiaitus, I promised, a fermata, small pause… and a week passed… and another…

I’m sorry but I’m having a bit of a why me? Week. Be warned the adult content ie swearing warning system, is switched on.

I’m sure everyone else’s lives are the same as mine, you plan stuff and something goes wrong and you have to do that instead. I’m sure that’s what life is… it’s just that I live under the impression that sometimes, other people’s lives do actually go the way they plan. Especially the ORGANISED ones. The way it looks from here, in the pit of disorganised pandemonium, naturally, they plan, they book, it happens and all is peachy.

When I emulate them, I plan, I book, something else happens, I cancel and all is tits up. No wonder everyone thinks I’m so fucking good in a crisis! My whole life comprises one crisis after another and if they’re not my own, I seem to have this uncanny knack of getting sucked into other people’s.


You know what’s coming don’t you.

Yeh. SOMETHING has happened to the woman THINGS happen to. A family crisis.

So I’ve been trying to sort out the final bits of baby stuff as it’s 36 weeks next week and you never know! Trouble is, SPD being tricky some days, shopping is a trial, plus I can only just squeeze into my car without the aid of swarfega – well actually I can squeeze in it’s getting out I can’t do and if it would stop fucking raining for ONE day when I have to go somewhere I’d take the lid off and all I’d have to do is stand up. Yesterday? Warm. Bright sun. Today, pissing with rain because I have physio. Sigh. But I digress.

Stuff. That’s where I was. Yeh, well, I’m ordering it all off the internet which means, ideally, I need to be at home for at least 7 days after I place each order to ensure I’ll be there to receive it.

Post is fine, it sits in the depot round the corner until I go collect it but with couriers they tend to try once and then bugger off. If you’re lucky they keep it for three days before sending it back to whoever sent it to you but even if you arrive home in time you still have to slog off to their depot, usually about 50 miles away, to pick it up.

Clearly if you’re not home for seven straight working days for two months or more, ordering off the internet turns into a game of courier chicken.  At the moment the couriers are winning.


Two months of visiting strange beds with insufficient or just plain different pillows and I’ve had my fill. It’s not been good for the SPD at night although thank heavens it’s eased off during the day and after four whole nights in my own bed, it’s been much better the last couple of nights, too.

I crave a whole weekend at home. Was off to a 40th birthday this weekend, the last of the once in a life time, I’ve got to do these things standing between me and calm before baby. Then it was a case of 3 blessed weeks without having to go anywhere to order the last bunch of stuff, plan, sort the nursery, pack up my office and generally sort everything out. No nights away looming, no going anywhere, just Mr BC and me in our little pod.

I’ve been looking forward to it.

So what happens? Yep, Mum in-Law – who lives six hours away – has fallen and broken her leg. It’s pretty grim, she’ll be in hospital for a week so we’ve binned the 40th birthday in favour of whizzing down to Wales for a few days to help her settle in when she comes out. That’s more working days away though (slightly panicky timbre in BC’s voice here). We’d have to be a special kind of shitty to even think of not going, though. They are lovely and they genuinely need our help.

It’s a 6 hour drive though.

6 hours. That’s a lot of pee breaks.

We’re going on Saturday after my first anti-natal class. Tuesday we come home. Mr BC has meetings the length and breadth of the country. If we can find a station, he’ll drop me off and I’ll get a train to Birmingham where I can go shopping – now there’s a thought – and as the last one is there, he can pick me up on his way back, seeing as that’s where he’ll end up. That would be good and if I can find a commodious bed shop possibly even restful…

We’ll have to go back to Wales again though. I think possibly in week 38 which is getting really, uncomfortably close to the wire… Doubts surround the straight 7 working days then… still the day shopping in Brum might sort that.

Poor Mum (in-law), it’s not her fault and at least it’s happened now between the chronic SPD and actual scheduled poppage so in theory I might actually be able to be of some practicable use to them! In fact, if Muffin arrives when due – which I did – then she’ll be up and about and on the mend by that time and we can rest easy in our own chaotic time knowing she and Dad are ok.

On the up side. Since it’s happened to my own Dad, before, at least I can reassure them and think of things that might be useful to take down there, a non slip bathmat, a plastic patio chair for the shower (with wet exes round the legs so they don’t scratch the bath). Some books for her to read or maybe some puzzle books, crosswords and stuff like that for her to do.

It’s a bit of a worry though and people keep telling me I need to take it easy and relax. In fact if I hear that one more time I’m going to do somebody an injury!

Sometimes, duty calls. They need our help. It’s just a bit of a worry they need us now… especially as I’m sure it’s breech, I have a number of minor but significant if ignored complications and I’ve heard things about the Welsh NHS that would make your blood curdle…

On the unrelated up side. We got a major purchase out of the way yesterday. We had identified a pushchair/travel system we wanted but it was £500! I kid you not! However, I found a second hand one which had only been used for about 7 months on Ebay. Usually on Ebay the second hand ones go for about £450 – hardly worth it. However, if you can find a pick up only one, they usually go for less, in this case for £200.

It belonged to somebody just down the road from my parents – who turned out to know them. Ok so if I lived near the Wirrel I’d have got one for less BUT my Mum and Dad, who were intent on buying us a pushchair, took delivery and paid for it, bless em! I’m so pleased to have got it for £200 – it’s still too much but at least I’ve saved them a bit of cash as they were intent on buying it for us new!

The woman dropped it off last night – so although I have to go schlepping down there to collect it I’ve successfully given them scope to feel indulgent and generous without costing them too much (wish I could have got it for £150 though, I hate my parents spending that much money).

The £500 price for a new one covers a car seat as well but the girl told my Mum that I should forget that and buy the bog standard mothercare one which fits. Which car seat have I managed to blag, free?

Drum roll… wait for it…

Yes! The bog standard mothercare one. So potentially, they’ve scored us the whole £500 system for £200!


So things are ok, if a little more hectic than I need or want them to be – more hectic than they are when I’m not pregnant and going at life like a bull in a china shop, frankly. Never mind, when the baby comes. It will feel like fucking peace at last after all this!

Oh yes. Everything has an up side if you look for it.



1. Mrs. Nicklebee - 23, April 2008

Welcome back, BC! That’s great about the deals you’ve gotten. 🙂

I have no doubt that you will be a blessing to your MIL, considering all that you learned from your Dad’s experience and your own knee stuff, but I’ll be praying that things go smoothly for you while you’re there helping her. It’s frustrating when plans get knocked so far out of whack, but you’re a great daughter in-law for being willing to go help. Many people would not do that!

Re: Couriers – I hear ya! It’s an international conspiracy!

2. babychaos - 23, April 2008

Thanks for those kind words… I do wish just sometimes my plans missed the knocking ball! Glad I’m not the only one who has courier trouble!



3. Steff - 24, April 2008

Hi – sorry to hear the chaos fairies are descending again! Glad things are going well otherwise though and you continue to sound very upbeat when most of us (ok maybe just me!) would be lying down having a whinge about the ailments that have come with the pregnancy. I have to put my nose in and say that at 38 weeks I do not see why you would be expected to venture out to Wales – trust me I understand in-law duties but it is not your first priority. I would think that would be understood, the timing is unfortunate but if they are that in need of help and no one else can possibly do it surely they can get a nurse rather than their ready to pop daughter in law? Of course I would find a Gavin & Stacy style baby caper in Wales amusing, but would much prefer to hear things were calm and you settled safe at home when that time comes. So that’s my nosy two cents, sorry! Couriers are useless, especially living in a city ugh! Not much better are the Royal Mail, who so royally shirk the responsibility when things go wrong – that’s another story though! Glad you are getting things sorted and able to save a few bob on what must be an expensive outlay.

4. babychaos - 24, April 2008

It’s not as bad as it sounds, I’m 35 weeks and going down there in week 36 but we probably will have to go again in week 38. They are in the shit because apart from knowing the woman who lives next door slightly they know absolutely no one – everyone has died or moved away. They hate it there, it’s driving them crazy and they want to leave but they can’t sell their house (that’s another story).

The thing that has pissed me off a bit is that one of Mr BC’s brothers and family live a 2 hour drive away and I was kind of hoping they might make it down for a holding visit one evening this week in a way that we can’t. I may be doing them a huge injustice but there doesn’t seem to have been any movement. It wouldn’t be easy for them because they both work and it isn’t like they could schedule meetings nearby the way I could when the same thing happened to my Dad… or like they have the kind of boss who’d turn a blind eye to it the way mine did. It’s just a bit tricky for all of us I guess…

In my family, when my Dad broke his leg my brother and I called each other up and worked out who could go down when so we could space our visits out at regular intervals and they always had the prospect of one or other of us visiting to look forward to every 10 days or so. I suggested this to Mr BC – because I can see us all going down at the first weekend and then them having to go weeks before they see us again – but he reacted with something approaching horror saying that organising visits were between his father and his brother to sort out and he certainly couldn’t get involved. Oh how much easier it would be if he did!

Worse, I suspect dad in-law isn’t eating well. He’s lost 6lbs in 3 days and he doesn’t cook so he’s having things like Welsh rarebit for lunch and no supper because he gets home from visiting at 9.30 and doesn’t feel like eating then. I know he’s missing her and worried she’s not coping – he almost asked us outright to come today – which we can’t because Mr BC has some board meetings and stuff to attend today and tomorrow, not to mention Saturday’s anti-natal class. But even hinting you’d like some help is absolutely unheard of in that family they are all stoic, stoic, stoic. So the poor guy must be really suffering.

Meanwhile, I reckon if Mr BC rang the brother and suggested they space out visits to optimise the company/assistance etc they could help make sure they always had a visit from one of us to look forward to…

Life is too short not to communicate. I’m just thankful my lot do.



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