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We’re caught in a trap… 21, January 2009

Posted by babychaos in baby stuff, General Wittering.
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We can’t get out… because we’re waiting for the courier with my new phone.

“We can give you a delivery slot.”  They tell me proudly.

“Great.”  I say.  “When.”

“Wednesday, any time between 8 am and 6 pm.”

Mmm…  Less of a slot and more of a day then.

Oh well…

Needless to say it’s the one day I had two things to go to with Best Boy which I’ve had to cancel.  I can’t even go into the garden because I won’t hear them knocking on the door from there and of course, naturally, it’s a beautiful, bright, crisp, sunny winter afternoon.

Rarer than unicorn poop.

Going begging.

Arse.

I can’t even have a cup of coffee.  We’ve run out of milk and of course, until it’s delivered I can’t leave the house to go to the local shop because that’s exactly when the buggers’ll turn up with it.

Knobs.

So…

What is the estimated time of delivery?

1.  Just too late for us to be able to grab everything and head over to my old home town for Rhyme Time, fun with other babies for Mini Me and a good old gossip with the girls for myself.

2. Just after it gets dark and is therefore too late for us to go out in the smashing sunshine, do the shopping and get the week’s veg from the market.

3.  After 6 pm, at the point where I’ve given up and gone out to the shop to buy a pint of milk.

Always assuming we’ve avoided option 3, where do we think I will be when it arrives?

1.  Bang in the middle of changing the boy’s nappy, ie when I can’t leave him and have to finish – ever tried to hold down an octopus and put an 8 armed coat on it?  Yeh, well that’s what trying to put a nappy on Mr Wrigglesworth is like – he usually does at least 4 full rotations in the course of each nappy change.  I will open the door on an empty street, a receding van and have to do the same bloody thing all over again tomorrow!

2.  While I am on the loo so I have to stop mid flow, wipe and dash to the door, not realising a large piece of loo paper is hanging out of the back of my trousers etc.

3.  In the final stages of soothing the boy off to sleep after a long drifting off session and naturally, too soon to leave him without having to start again.

When will it not arrive, however hard they try?

1.  When it’s convenient.

Oh dear, must go, as usual, boy is reaching through the bars of the playpen for something verboten!

Pipple toot!

Answer:

Just too late to go to rhyme time but wahoo, it’s still sunny so we’re off to the shops!

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Comments»

1. Dru - 22, January 2009

Ugh I feel your pain. I hate delivery people. At least it was still sunny 🙂

2. Michael Tim - 28, February 2009

I love your site!

_____________________
Experiencing a slow PC recently? Fix it now!

3. chrisfiore5 - 10, March 2009

hello BC,

I am happy to see your life is still chaotic… but your entry is a bit dated. Let me know how things have been.

peace.

4. Bill Howdle - 20, March 2009

I always enjoy your posts, you have such a wonderful way with words. You brought back such vivid memories of the times I spent changing diapers, back in the day.
Hope all is well with you my friend
Bill


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