More Mini Me 26, October 2010Posted by babychaos in General Wittering, Life and living, Mini Me, Mom, Mum.
Tags: children, kids, motherhood
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Mini me likes to “brush” my hair with a spoon and the handle of a pastry cutter (the wheel has long since disappeared).
“Table clap…” he was shouting yesterday as he did the brushing thing and then pretended to take something off the spoon and put it in his “kettle” (a stainless steel pot removed from one of his legal cupboards, we’re into ‘silver’ at the moment).
“Are you making tea?” I ask.
“Yes, table clap tea.”
“What’s table clap?”
“Table clap.” he says again, with a seraphic but very mischievious grin. Then the penny drops.
“Cradle cap?” I ask.
“Yes. Muggy’s cradle cap.”
“You’re making cradle cap tea?”
New swear word (or at least he thinks it is) learned after mother stands up fast, banging her head on the corner of a cupboard door as she goes and shouts the beginnings of an obscenity which she manages to change to “clangy bell” before he’s properly heard.
Junior now shouts “clangy bell” at every opportunity because he thinks it might be naughty. Never mind, it’s better than the original.
He’s been out in the rain in his pushchair with his dad. He’s fine but Mr Tiger who goes everywhere with him at the moment, is somewhat soggy.
“Poor Mr Tiger’s soaked. Shall I put him in the tumble dryer for a minute or two?” I ask and Mini-me says.
“No thank you, Muggy. He will get dizzy.”
Sorry I’ve been so absent… I’m launching a book. It should be sorted by the end of the week though. Boy will I be happy when it’s done.
More antics of mini me 25, September 2010Posted by babychaos in General Wittering, Life and living, Mini Me, Mum.
Tags: children, General Wittering, motherhood
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Grand Prix qualifying today, wee man was having his ‘rest’ he doesn’t sleep but he does need some time on his own so I put him upstairs with books and he burbles away. Mr BC and I sat happily in front of the telly listening to the baby monitor.
God knows how but he’d managed to get a pot of sudocreme – that’s nappy cream to the non breeders – it was a huge catering sized vat.
Downstairs, Mr BC and I are listening as we watch, it’s about time to collect Mini Me but he’s very quiet, is he asleep? We listen? No… there is some noise but it’s furtive – none of the usual cheery singing. After 20 minutes or so we decide he is awake and, knowing how much he will love the qualifying he likes ‘fast cars’ I go up and get him.
The site that greets me is… interesting. Imagine a mechanic. The messiest mechanic you have ever seen, with oil on their forehead, arms, clothes and everything else around them. Got that? Right, now turn the black white. I know he’s been up to something the minute I walk in because an aura of glee almost knocks me over when I go into the room.
I open the curtains and he looks up at me smiling. There is sudocreme on his forehead, his dummy and he clutches a sock in one hand which is also white with sudocreme. His trousers are white, his shirt is white and he has removed an arm and one shoulder to wear it toga style.
“Ah,” I say, “I see you have some sudocreme.”
“I have put it on this tractor,” he holds the white greasy tractor up proudly, “and this tractor,” he holds up another one, “and my feet.”
“Mmm…” I say, “Why?” That’s thrown him. He looks nonplussed but continues to smile proudly and sweetly. “Is there any left?” I ask. He hands me the container and I peer in. “No.”
It is also all over his books, and Mr Tiger, his favourite cuddly, has a slightly greasy sheen.
“Did you…?” I point.
“He had a sore bottom.” He says. The laughter bubbles up, like John McEnroe, I canNOT be serious.
More antics of Mini-Me 12, September 2010Posted by babychaos in baby stuff, General Wittering, Life and living, Mini Me, Mom, Mum, toddlers.
Tags: children, General Wittering
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Wee man has taking to running round the house unaccompanied. This is OK if I listen out but when things go very quiet it’s time to go and investigate.
Today things went quiet but I was on the loo and well you know how it is I was trapped until I had finished. The unusually peaceful atmosphere was occasionally broken by the sound of footsteps overhead. Oh dear. Then silence, except for a gentle thump every now and again, a door banging quietly? Yes, sounded like it.
As soon as I was able I headed hot foot upstairs. Nothing, not a peep.
There had been an incursion into Mr BC’s office which needed to be put right and then, as I finished tidying up, I heard it again, a gentle thud. Hmm… had he got trapped in the spare room again? He can get in there but not always out.
I went into the hall.There was the bang again. I recognised it now, it was the spare bathroom or one of the cuboards – but I couldn’t remember which one.
“Where is he…?” I said to myself as I walked. As I reached the airing cupboard the door opened slowly and a small blonde boy with the biggest most seraphic smile I have ever seen peeped out.
“I have been hiding., he said proudly and pointed, “in there…”
“Mmm… you have, haven’t you?” Was all I could say.
He’d done all sorts of bad things, like going upstairs unattended, going into his father’s office and mussing up my neatly stacked towels but there was no mischief in it and anyway I was laughing too much to be able to tell him off.
Back downstairs he spent the morning running around with an orange balloon he’d been given to take home from a party. He is very keen on the balloon and keeps saying,
“Thank you Eleanor. Thank you for my balloon.” (It was Eleanor’s party) Then he hands it to me and says. “Muggie’s balloon.” That’s my cue to chase him round the house bashing him over the head with it while he guffaws with laughter. The game usually ends when he’s laughing too much to be able to run any more and trips over and hurts himself.
“I bang my knee.” He will say, standing on one leg and proffering the banged knee upwards. “Muggy kiss it better.”
I do as I am told.
And now I must sleep, Mini BC is getting up very early at the moment.
Babychaos… 1, August 2010Posted by babychaos in baby stuff, General Wittering, Life and living, Light Fluff, Mini Me, Mum.
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Interesting couple of days…
Junior’s latest trick. I go to the loo, he follows me in the loo with a chair and the loveliest, most beatific of smiles. He drags the chair to just in front of me.
“I sit down.” he says and then does. He then proceeds to help himself to tiny pieces of loo paper which he posts between my legs, or behind me.
Heaven forfend that I should dare to flush without his assistance. The we wash our hands. A few days ago he forgets the chair as he’s closing the door he makes to go get it so I say, “don’t worry, we can leave it there.”
Ha pauses for thought.
“Bye-bye chair,” he says. Another pause. “Bye-by wee, Bye-bye poo,” and he shuts the door.
This morning, in church, he emptied my wallet, arranging the credit cards, receipts, books of stamps etc, across the pew. He then starts to post things through the gap between two floorboards. I have to retrieve a train ticket with the tweezers from my penknife but luckily it turns out I’ve clocked what’s happening in time and nothing else of import has gone missing.
Then there’s the grandparents, Gramma and Pappa van (because they have a camper) and Ganny and Pops well here you have to quack like a duck and blow a raspberry. I fear I’m rather eccentric to have children.
More things… 14, June 2010Posted by babychaos in baby stuff, Life and living, Mini Me, Mom, Mum, toddlers.
Have just been to France with Mr BC and Mini Me, leaving in-laws here. They’re bedding in nicely, there have been some heart to hearts and we are gradually shaking down and getting used to one another.
Arriving on the first day in France, Mr BC went out to buy some snacks. I put Mini-Me down for a rest. The room was great, a little room for him and a big one for us. So I popped him down and amongst the other burblings heard.
“I see lamp.”
Another long pause.
“Sing to lamp.”
Cue several circuits of Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star.
Later Mr BC and I heard.
“I love Muggy” (that’s me, he can’t say Mummy). “I love Daddy.”
“Daddy loves me…” pause… “Muggy loves me…”